Karen Finley "I Was Not Expected to be Talented"

This article really spoke to me. Being a woman, I can identify with what she is saying. The majority of this piece screams what I have thought at one point or another.

Karen talks about how she wanted a daughter so she could give her daughter the opportunities she never had. I love having a daughter, so I can do those things for her. Karen said, "I feel if I have a daughter I can give her the chances I never had. This is something perhaps only women would understand -- that up to this very day, girls, daughters are killed for being just that. Girls. Daughters. Females. No wonder the entire psyche of women is universally coached to be as desirable as possible, as boring as possible, as cute as possible. Obviously, it's for the survival of the female species." The second part of that quote hit me. I totally understand that. We are trained to be a certain way for approval, for survival. Men still cannot accept women as being strong and equal.

Karen also speaks about not being expected to be talented. I feel the opposite. I feel as if I was expected to be very talented, but I've failed. I understand her, but feel the opposite. I feel as if I have disappointed people. "You know why I only feel comfortable around the collapsed, the broken, the inebriated, the helpless, and the poor -- CAUSE THEY LOOK LIKE WHAT I FEEL INSIDE!" I completely understand that quote. I feel like that the majority of the time. I just put on a mask and pretend everything is okay. That's how society, especially women were trained to act.

"I've been needed, rejected, and desired, but never valued by anyone."